Just weeks before her 16th birthday, our eldest showed us a picture of a friend standing in front of her brand-new car. Tied around the pristine white automobile was a larger-than-life red velvet bow, and propped in front of the car was a very sizable, beautifully decorated sign that read, “Happy Birthday!”
Two weeks later we gifted my daughter a not-so-pristine, 20-year-old car. Just for fun, I stuck a small, packaged-size Christmas bow on the hood and covered up one of the dents with a yellow Post-it note that read, “Happy Birthday!” with a heart and smiley face.
We got a laugh out of the discrepancy, and my daughter was more than grateful to simply have a car. But I couldn’t help thinking about how much more I wished I could give my girl on that milestone birthday.
A Humbling Perspective
When it comes to conversations regarding material resources, it’s always important to remind each other of one quick caveat: we Americans often have so much more than most of the rest of the world.
What’s interesting is that when we compare what we have to other’s financial means, we often measure ourselves against those who have much more than we do. I think it’s because, deep in our hearts, we’re envious of people who have more.
We don’t often compare ourselves to those who have much less. You don’t have to travel far to see poverty; it’s in our country, our states, and our communities. Those who have exceedingly less than we do are sometimes remarkably happier, as my daughter discovered when she spent time in Africa. When you take away the proverbial “keeping up with the Joneses,” there’s a lot of joy to be found. We need to be careful to avoid being more envious than we are grateful.
Embracing Our Limitations
With that said, there are many who live with the reality of great limitations financially. When our resources are limited, it affects our families. We might not be able to take the vacations we see others enjoying. We might not be able to pay for the school we wish our kids could attend. Or perhaps attending a camp simply isn’t financially possible.
There are limits to what we can afford for our children, and while everyone’s limits might not be the same, most parents experience the painful response to a child’s plea, “I’m sorry. We can’t afford that.”
That’s a difficult conversation to have, especially when what our teenagers desire is seemingly good. So, how does the gospel help us when it comes to our financial limitations as parents?
Experiencing God’s Limitless Provision
Jeremiah was a prophet in Judah during the final years before the Babylonian exile. The nation was under siege and on the brink of destruction when God told the prophet to buy a field in Israel, even though it was all about to be ruined.
The purchase was a symbol from God. Yes, there will be destruction, but one day his people will return to the land and rebuild it. Jeremiah responds by declaring God’s omnipotence, power, and faithfulness. He says, “Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you” (Jer. 32:17).
What was in front of God’s people was bleak, but God’s creative and unlimited power shone through. Jeremiah could not help but delight in the hope that comes from God’s ability to do far beyond what we can even imagine (Eph. 3:20).
This truth extends to our financial means by reminding us of two aspects about God that speak to us as parents and to our kids as we respond to our financial limitations:
God provides abundantly.
There may be times when what is in front you seems daunting. I remember watching friends celebrate as their teenagers decided on a college, while secretly wondering if we would ever be able to afford college for our kids.
If what you are pursuing with and for your child seems goodfor their spiritual and emotional growth, then ask God to provide. Nothing is too hard for him! Remind your teenager of this truth, and ask God together to provide the means necessary, if the opportunity will bring him glory. Write on a notecard, “Nothing is too hard for God,” and pray boldly when you see it, knowing that God is able.
If in his grace and mercy, God provides, then give him the glory! What a testimony for our children to see firsthand the generous kindness of God.
God is not bound by our limits.
However, if what we pray for is not provided, and we can’t financially commit, it’s okay to acknowledge the disappointment. And we also remember that the Lord’s direction is always good and never to harm or hurt us (Jer. 29:11). The two realities of disappointment and of trust in God intertwine for Christians. It’s just as beneficial for our kids to learn this duality as it is to learn that nothing is too hard for him.
Trusting in God Beyond Our Financial Limits
Remember that God is not limited by our limitations. In other words, though I can’t always provide materially what I wish I could, that does not mean that my child will have a less fulfilling life than a young adult who has been given more.
Our God is perfectly sovereign, and he purposefully placed your child in your care. It’s not a coincidence. God’s loving purposes for your child will prevail. His divine and good ways cannot be limited by our physical limitations. He is, after all, the One who gave us those limitations. Our responsibility is to trust in his goodness and to continue reminding our children of God’s great love. What we can provide financially is secondary to our child’s heart and their relationship with Jesus.
Ultimately, the Good News found in our financial limitations is that our true worth and security are not found in material wealth but in Christ’s sufficiency. Jesus, though rich, became poor for our sake, offering us the greatest gift—reconciliation with God.
This truth frees us from the anxiety of financial struggles, knowing that God, who gave his Son for us, will provide for all our needs (Philippians 4:19). God asks that we trust in his limitless provision, find contentment in his care, and focus on eternal treasures. He can provide peace and joy even in times of financial scarcity.
Rooted offers mentorship and training for youth and family ministers.
