When I was a senior in college, I joined a new church. It was a new experience for me because I had attended the same church from the time I was born to the time my family moved to a new state.
For the first several months after the move, I visited church after church after church. The search was emotionally exhausting. I was disappointed by how often I encountered unfriendly people at the various churches I visited, especially at young adult groups. My hope was to find a community of likeminded individuals in the same life stage as me, but I was often ignored rather than invited in.
I’m thankful God led me to the church I now attend with my family. Even though the process of finding it wasn’t easy, I learned many valuable lessons about how believers can—and should—approach visitors.
Having recently gone through this process, I want to share a few biblical suggestions as to how you and the students in your youth group can help new students feel at home at church. When we set a Christlike example, foster a friendly environment, and remember the “why” of our actions, we accept new students in the same way Jesus has accepted us.
Set a Christlike Example
No matter how small or large your youth group is, students who are new to the group will notice if you’re kind to them—or if you’re not kind to them. We all know how it feels to be ignored or overlooked. That’s why we need to ensure we never make new students feel this way.
Being aware and alert is an essential part of setting an example of friendliness and acceptance in your youth group. If you see any new students, approach them, introduce yourself, and ask them questions to learn more about them. If they continue to visit your youth group, engage more in conversations with them as they become comfortable. They just want to know that someone sees them and wants them to be there. And ultimately, showing Christlike love to new students can encourage current students to do the same.
Consider Jesus’ interaction with the woman at the well in John 4. Despite her messy past, he boldly approached her and conversed with her. Even though she didn’t know him, he knew her and wanted to show his love to her. This conversation transformed both her life and the lives of others in her town (see 4:28). Her redemption story started with a single conversation with the Savior.
Foster a Friendly Environment
Being friendly toward new students is definitely important for youth leaders, but it’s not enough to simply be a friendly youth leader. New students need to feel welcomed from fellow youth group students as well. When I was searching for a young adult group to join, I met several welcoming group leaders but few welcoming group members. Ultimately, I stayed at the church where I found both.
One of the best ways to help new students feel welcome is simply to encourage—and provide opportunities for—your current students to welcome new students. This can look differently depending on the size of your youth group. If your youth group is small, you may want to invite all of the students to introduce themselves before you start the lesson and/or play a get-to-know-you game afterward. If your youth group is large, take a moment before you start the lesson to have everyone greet his or her neighbor. You can also split up your large group into smaller groups to discuss the lesson.
Regardless of your youth group’s size, continually emphasize the significance of friendliness to current students so they’ll be ready to welcome new ones. Youth group is so much more than a place for students to hang out with their friends. When new students walk into a youth group environment that’s warm and welcoming, the gospel—Christ inviting us into his family—is being lived out in a wonderful and tangible way.
Remember the “Why”
Ultimately, the reason I stayed at the church I now attend is because people accepted and included me. But I believe the reason they were kind is because they heard—and heeded—the truth of God’s Word. Perhaps without even realizing it, those who helped me feel welcome were displaying the love of Christ. Their beliefs about Jesus naturally flowed out of their words and actions.
If you notice a lack of openness and acceptance in your youth group, it may be time to remind students why these attributes matter and why they’re called to exhibit them. Jesus sacrificed his life so we could become part of his family. When we put our trust in him, we’re no longer outsiders—we’re included. We’re called to accept each other because he accepted us.
May Paul’s words in Romans serve as a prayer for our youth groups today:
Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus, so that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.
Romans 15:5-67, NASB
Called to Welcome
God will give you the perseverance and encouragement you need as you seek to welcome new students who come to your youth group. Pray for strength to show kindness toward new students and for your current students to do likewise. God will be glorified as you set a Christlike example for them, foster a friendly environment among them, and remind them why welcoming outsiders matters so much.
If you’d like to lean more about gospel-centered youth ministry, there are still a few spots left for our August 2024 Youth Ministry Mentorship Cohorts. Sign up today!
