In Beyond the Back Row: Rediscovering the Beauty of the Local Church for Your Family, Rooted blog author Katie Polski encourages parents to lean into involvement in the local church, in spite of many contemporary challenges.
My memories of church as a child include a dear older couple who became lovingly known as my pew parents. “Please pass the Cheerios!” I’d whisper at full force as I leaned over to them in the middle of the service. Both my mom and my dad were involved in Sunday morning services growing up, so as a young child, each Sunday included sitting with my pew parents, occasional stern looks from the stage (followed by gentle pats from my pew parents), and Cheerios.
These dear, surrogate parents always had ample Cheerios.
The influence of older church members continued into my elementary school years with Sunday School teachers who, with admirable patience, endured my endless questions about heaven. And in high school, I had the privilege of learning from older female mentors who remain influential in my life to this day.
One of the richest blessings of being part of God’s Church is the opportunity to love and be loved across generations. A church that is multi-generational simply has people of all ages present. But a church that is intergenerational is one in which people of all ages are actively engaging with one another. It’s one thing to be in the same room; it’s another to be doing life together.
Doing life together is essential in youth ministry. During this life stage, students are significantly influenced by their peers. While those friendships are crucial, if teenagers have little or no exposure to people in different life stages, they will miss out on the deep and often life-changing benefits of intergenerational relationships.
The Blessing of Intergenerational Relationships
It’s often easier, and certainly less messy, to engage with people in the same stage of life. But to do so exclusively means missing out on the richness that intergenerational relationships bring. Teenagers need mentors who’ve weathered seasons they haven’t yet faced. And the older generation needs the wisdom and vitality of youth.
Too often, the youth group is treated as a detached ministry in which only a few in the congregation are invested. When this is the case, the spiritual and emotional growth of the church can be stunted.
Sometimes, the root of that disconnection is a quiet pride. It may be that some in our churches imagine they can’t learn from those who are younger than they are. But that mindset misses the humility and gentleness we’re called to (Eph. 4:1). When we dismiss younger people as “too immature,” we forgo the call to disciple one another (Prov. 27:17). Or maybe those of us serving teenagers neglect seeking wisdom from those who are older than us—disregarding the biblical truth that age often brings depth and discernment (Job 12:12).
At the heart of ministry is the gospel itself: the good news that Jesus came to rescue us from sin and restore us to God through his death and resurrection. This message is not just for the young or the old—it’s for everyone. And the call to follow Jesus is a call into a family, not just a personal faith. Intergenerational relationships become one of the clearest ways we reflect the love, grace, and unity found in Christ.
Intergenerational ministry is one of the most significant ways that the gospel is passed on within the local church. So how does it strengthen our ministries, and what can youth ministers do to encourage intergenerational integration?
Intergenerational Ministry Offers Perspective
Serving in youth ministry often falls to those brand new to church ministry or just out of college. These volunteers are extremely valuable, but we must also invite in the perspective that older believers offer.
There is something unique about a sixteen-year-old hearing from a woman in her seventies who has walked with the Lord for decades. These stories of perseverance, doubt, and God’s faithfulness show what long-term commitment to Jesus looks like. But students will rarely hear these stories unless we’re intentional about creating the space for them.
Youth ministers, please consider inviting older members to serve with students, share testimonies, lead a small group, or even join on retreats. They might not be quick to put themselves forward as potential youth leaders, but the influence and perspective of these older saints may be greater than they realize.
Intergenerational Ministry Spurs on Prayer
I remember a woman in her mid-fifties who served in our youth group when I was young. Her prayers for us often brought me to tears—they were so tender and sincere, and made a huge impact on me as a teenager. She still prays for our family to this day.
At the same time, there is so much that the older generation can learn from our teenagers as they commit to praying for them. When you hear the stories of students who are trying to follow Jesus amid cultural noise, it’s inspiring. Praying for one another, across generations, strengthens the entire church.
One church I know has a prayer wall for middle and high school students, where adults can take requests and pray anonymously. The students also pray through adult requests during small group time. And some churches even match youth with “prayer mothers” or “prayer fathers.” These rhythms of prayer build sometimes unseen but powerful bridges in a congregation.
Intergenerational Ministry Promotes Connection
When the whole church —young and old—intentionally invests in teenagers, the Christian faith comes alive in a way that’s more compelling, lasting, and real for them. At the same time, adults grow in faith and joy as they walk alongside the next generation.
The intergenerational bond strengthens the fabric of the church, making it a cohesive and solid unit, much like a tapestry that is beautifully woven together. But when the local church functions as untied threads that are not connected, the tapestry eventually unravels. God intends for the local church to function as one body growing together in love and faith.
Youth ministers, service across generations promotes this connectedness in significant ways. When you are serving shoulder to shoulder with someone in a different stage of life, the bonds that form are undeniable. Don’t hesitate to ask people who are older to join a mission trip or to be a part of the Saturday service project.
When differing generations know each other better, they worship together in deeper ways. Let’s be a church that doesn’t just gather together but that grows together—across generations—for the good of our youth and the glory of God.
Looking for gospel-centered support and training in youth ministry? Apply today for Rooted’s youth ministry mentorship, a 12-month program offering personal and group coaching.
