“How do I invite my non-Christian friends to youth group or FCA if they’ve already said no before?”
This is a question I often get from my students as a youth leader who didn’t grow up in church. At the retreat, I shared my testimony, which includes my constantly rejecting my friends’ offers to attend FCA, youth group, and church. God used my Christian friends to plant seeds in my life. I didn’t respond to the gospel and follow Jesus until years later.
Over the years of serving in youth ministry, I’ve watched many students bring their unchurched friends to youth group and other events. I’ve observed several surrender their lives to Christ while others expressed no interest in the Christian faith. Our students feel discouraged when their unchurched friends are hesitant to attend or decline multiple invitations to church, youth group, or FCA meetings on their school campuses.
Here are two practical tips to teach our students how to handle these situations as they evangelize.
Help Your Students Realize the Importance of Building Relationships
As youth ministers, we have the privilege of walking alongside our students: encouraging and discipling them in their relationships with God. They also have their discipleship group leaders, youth group leaders, and other godly adults to shepherd them. Teenagers outside of the church often lack the deep friendships and mentorship relationships that the church body provides.
Let’s encourage our students to invest relationally in their non-Christian friends. I encourage my students to befriend non-believers. Our teenagers can reflect Christ’s love and be a light to their unbelieving friends. Jesus teaches his disciples to reflect Christ and let our light shine before others: “In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven” (Matt. 5:16). The Lord used my Christian friends to plant seeds of truth in my life during my middle and high school years before I became a Christian. God can use our students to witness to their friends, as he did in my story.
My Christian friends listened to me and made me feel seen and known. These friends took the time to learn about my hobbies and interests. Their presence and care were evident in their words and actions. Although I declined all their invitations to church and youth group, I knew they cared deeply for me.
I tell my students that sometimes you may not know the influence you’ve had on a friend’s life until years later (if at all). I remind them to keep pursuing their non-Christian friends and being obedient to what the Lord has called them to do in sharing their faith and lives with their friends.
Remind Your Students that Faithfulness in Sharing Their Faith Matters
Several of my Christian friends shared the gospel with me often. I didn’t grasp the concept of trusting God, nor did I have a desire to become a Christian. From my experience, these friends were different, but in a good way. Their character reflected godliness, and they treated me with honor and respect that I didn’t experience in other friendships. The Holy Spirit’s work in them was noticeable, and they sought opportunities to talk about how they saw God in their lives. My Christian friends were faithful to share, and that’s what has stuck with me as I mentor teenagers.
After sharing the gospel, many of my students express their discouragement that their friends aren’t receptive. I remind my students that being obedient to the Lord in sharing your faith with your non-Christian friends is worth the cost of proclaiming the gospel (Rom. 1:16). We can point them to the truth that they’re planting seeds into their friends’ lives, and only the Holy Spirit can open their friends’ hearts. Scripture reminds us that only God gives the growth (1 Cor. 3:6).
The Faithfulness of God and the Impact of Boldness
At the lowest point of my life, when I was battling an anxiety disorder and struggling academically in my senior year of college, the gospel finally clicked for me. I surrendered my life to Christ when I was 21 years old, and the Lord transformed my life. Years after my friends shared the gospel with me, I had a personal relationship with the Lord.
I remember reading as a new believer in Scripture: “But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Rom. 5:8). That truth radically transformed how I viewed God’s grace toward me. Jesus paid the price for me. It made me realize the depth of God’s love for me. It was something I never experienced before. A loving Father with abounding grace and mercy for his children. And those Christian friends’ pursuit and persistence in loving me as a friend opened my eyes to the truth of their words and to a God who pursued my heart when I wanted nothing to do with him.
My testimony is an example of the boldness and faithfulness of my Christian friends who were obedient to the Lord and shared their faith. Our students need us as youth ministers to help them see evangelism as a process, not a checklist item. They need our wisdom in navigating friendships with their non-Christian friends and encouragement to boldly share the gospel with them. Friendships are a vessel that God uses to change lives for eternity.
Want more resources and ideas as you help your students learn to share their faith? Check out our various youth ministry podcasts!
